I realize this is a body positive blog and I constantly encourage others to love themselves right where they are. That will never change. I personally work hard every day to find joy in my current size. However, I do have a limit and I don’t think anything’s wrong with that.
There’s no doubt that I’m the biggest I’ve ever been and that comes with new territory. I’m still learning things about this new body. Life can get in the way and make that a challenge. There are stressful times in my life that lead me to make bad food choices and abstain from exercise. Those are the times when I get really, really close to my limit. The times when I start cracking down on my weight and trying to shed some pounds. I have my limit for a reason. There is a certain weight on the scale that tends to correlate with my health being compromised. That weight deserves some special attention.
During nursing I past my first weight limit as a mom. I’ve passed many limits in my life and each time I had hoped to back track. Most of those were in vanity but lately, that’s changed. Two years ago, I stepped on the scale and completely cringed. Nursing was making my hunger insatiable and that meant weight was packing on quickly. I told myself I’d start dieting and get my weight down. At that time I was experiencing some weird hormonal imbalances and sleep apnea. It was enough to make me nervous and try to drop the weight. Unfortunately, that weight never went away. In fact, I found a way to gain 10 more pounds over my limit.
Now I have a new limit and I’ve promised myself I will not surpass it. I’ve gotten too close to it in the past couple of years and my sleep apnea has gotten worse. The hormonal imbalance has remained long after pregnancy and I have stomach issues way more than any normal person should. It’s a problem. Writing this blog has helped me really get to know my body and start to accept it for what it is. But this isn’t really about the number on the scale. There is a point where it all becomes about my health. I’ve been trying to make small life changes to help me stay under my limit, like cutting my portions and making healthier choices. Nothing drastic, just cautionary. It’s important I love my body by taking care of it.
I encourage you to get to know your body too. Learn to love it but also listen to it. Your health is one thing that is easy to take for granted. Continue to stay body positive but take care of yourself in the process.
I want to hear from you, do you have a limit?